“You are not to have sexual relations with both a woman and her daughter, nor are you to have sexual relations with her son’s daughter or her daughter’s daughter; they are close relatives of hers, and it would be shameful. You are not to take a woman to be a rival with her sister and have sexual relations with her while her sister is still alive.”-Leviticus 18:17-18
In verses 17 and 18 we shift away from the issue of marriage between blood relatives to simply moral matters involving sex.
We’re told that a man should not have sex with both a woman and her daughter.
Specifically, this daughter is a child the woman gave birth to with another man.
Then in verse 18 we come to the injunction that one is NOT to marry two or more sisters or take them both as wives at the same time.
Okay, we have a little problem here.
This command is explicitly violated by some of the most Godly men in the Bible.
Abraham claims that Sarah is his half sister.
Later on, David’s daughter appears to think its okay for her father to arrange a marriage between her and her half brother Amnon.
And probably the most famous example of them all: Jacob marries two sisters, Rachel and Leah.
Although Jacob’s marriage to Rachel and Leah occurred BEFORE Leviticus, we must still ask the question of were they in the wrong?
I’ve read quite a bit of commentary on this and the only somewhat satisfactory answer I can come up with is although it was not God’s ideal will, it was his general will to permit it at that time.
Sorry.
That’s the best I can do and I’m not going to allegorize or come up with some super lofty nice-sounding reason to defend God’s choices and rulings on certain matters.
Although it wasn’t ideal, he allowed it at the time, and that’s that.
This wouldn’t be much different with the issue of eating meat which was prohibited before the flood but was permitted to eat after the flood.
Why?
I don’t know.
I think we need to become a little more comfortable with the tension that sometimes exists between God’s IDEAL and His commands.
Take the matter of pre-marital sex.
Is it God’s ideal will to keep ALL sexual activity between married people only?
Absolutely!
Will you find a specific command in Torah prohibiting sex before marriage?
You will NOT!
You can search high and low and take a high-powered microscope to the Torah and you will not find one “Thou shall NOT have sexual relations with an unmarried woman” commandment, NOT ONE!
This reminds me of a true story I was reading about an Israeli female spy working for Mossad.
As an attractive operative in service to protect her country, she sometimes had to sleep with her targets to accomplish her mission objectives.
That’s right, I’m talking about a single female bedding down with men who she was obviously not married with to either get information critical to a mission or maybe later she was going to assassinate them or maybe both.
Was it God’s ideal will for this unmarried female spy to have sex with different men?
Absolutely not.
Was it is His general will that He would allow it if the actions she took would protect the Holy Land?
I would say yes.
My point in sharing this is that in a fallen world, sometimes there are situations where we CANNOT fulfill God’s ideal will.
And there are even situations that arise where we might actually have to break a commandment to adhere to a more important commandment.
Think of a doctor working on Shabbat to save a life.
What’s more important, that the doctor rest per the “Thou shalt not work on Shabbat” command or that he work so he can save a life.
Unless you’re retarded, I think the answer is obvious.
Look at the world we live in man!
We don’t live in a black-and-white world where everything is as easy as 1 plus 1 equals 2.
We live in a fallen world where there is sickness, sin, death, war, earthquakes, crime, divorce, and the list goes on and on.
We prayerfully do the best we can with what the Lord has provided.
Thank HASHEM for His Word and thank Him for His Grace.
The only exception to the sex with an unmarried woman would be a virgin in her father’s house. We have been searching this out as well and cannot find any commandment forbidding sex with a non-virgin unmarried woman. In fact it’s astounding to see how twisted the definition of fornication has become over the centuries.
Shalom
Exodus 22:15-16 gives us a strong hint about God’s feelings on the matter. “If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price for her to be his wife. But if her father refuses to give her to him, he must pay a sum equivalent to the bride-price for virgins.” The God-ordained IDEAL is to keep sex in marriage. I would have no argument against that. Shalom.
I think a lot of this goes back to the roles of fathers. Us western world fathers have forgotten/neglected our duty in protecting our daughters until marriage. “We” allow them to go off into the world with no protection, when Scripture points out we are their protective head! I’m planning on keeping my daughter safe under me until her new head (husband) comes along.
God bless you 🙏
You can’t have a non-virgin unmarried girl unless someone had first had sex with her as a virgin, and by virtue of that deflowered her.
The question is one of “Consent”. Jacob did not consent to marry Leah only Rachel, but since he obviously had sex with her, Jacob’s honor dictated that regardless of his non recognition or desire of this marriage, he was duty bound to the principle ‘Touch her, she’s yours”. The vows are “assumed and unwritten” and Jacob chose to keep Leah. Two sisters in this case was allowed because he was “screwed into it”. Possibly a living reminder of the stunt he pulled on his brother.
Incorrect
The birthright was not “stolen” by Jacob.
Esau despised and sold his birthright to Jacob.
“And Jacob said, Swear to me this day; and he sware unto him: and he sold his birthright unto Jacob.”
Genesis 25:33 KJV
“lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright.”
Hebrews 12:16 KJV
Jacob obeyed his mother Rebekkah who when Jacob expressed concern about her plan working. also stated that a curse should be on her if the plan to have ISSAC bless Jacob rather than Esau did not work.
NOTE: Rebekka did not devise this plan by her own accord, but according to the will of The Most High.
“And the LORD said unto her, Two nations are in thy womb, And two manner of people shall be separated from thy bowels; And the one people shall be stronger than the other people; And the elder shall serve the younger. And when her days to be delivered were fulfilled, behold, there were twins in her womb. And the first came out red, all over like an hairy garment; and they called his name Esau. And after that came his brother out, and his hand took hold on Esau’s heel; and his name was called Jacob: and Isaac was threescore years old when she bare them.”
Genesis 25:23-26 KJV
It was written ESAU should serve Jacob (although Esau’s envy and anger did tear perpetually against Jacob …until this day: and therefore Eaau has yet to see Obidiah AND Joel 3 come to fruition: “Egypt shall be a desolation (spiritual Egypt:think a land of bondage/slavery), and Edom (that nation) shall be a desolate wilderness, for the violence against the children of Judah (JACOB), because they have shed innocent blood in their land.”
Joel 3:19 KJV
Esau is hated by the Most High God.
“As it is written, Jacob have I loved, but Esau have I hated.”
Romans 9:13 KJV
Yes! This is the answer that makes most sense,thank you for your input
I agree,Jacob was tricked.We never see a woman having two husbands,any thoughts on that?
Penny, Scripture does allow polygny (the practice or condition of a man having more than one wife at one time) but it does NOT allow polyandry (the practice or condition of a woman having more than one husband at one time). Shalom.
The man is the head of the woman. The woman was made as the helpmate. Why would God allow the helpmate to have two husbands (again, the man is the head of the woman)? The Bible is clear on this subject. You cannot read the Bible with the mentality that genders are completely equal as that is not God’s plan. God wanted kings to rule, not queens.I’m sorry women, but society has attempted to brainwash everyone, including Christians.
people seem to ignore the fact that the very act of sex IS the actual marriage and that the wedding feasts and/or blessings of the priests (mortals) were just traditions of men. And while some argue certain passages as “proof” to the contrary, it goes back to Gd’s ideals and tolerances. We see no evidence that any mortal religious leaders sanctioned the marriage of Isaac. just that he took her into his tent and did the deed. The problems come from man’s hard lustful heart. Man desires a way to avoid the rules and the consequences so he works actively to convince others of his sinful ideas. if two people eligible for marriage in Gd’s eyes choose to engage in sex, then they will be considered married in Gd’s eyes. this is supported by every scripture pertaining to the instructions of marriage and sex.
While I fully agree that no religious leader is required to “officiate” a wedding. People are not actually married unless they have a covenant in place. For Isaac and Rebecca, that was done far ahead of them entering the tent when her father and then her agreed to marry Abraham’s son and Abraham’s servant who had been authorized by Abraham agreed as well.
Also the statute that allows for a father to refuse a daughter in marriage even after she has slept with someone shows that the act of sex itself did not make them married.
Exodus 22:16-17 And if a man entice a maid that is not betrothed, and lie with her, he shall surely endow her to be his wife. If her father utterly refuse to give her unto him, he shall pay money according to the dowry of virgins.
That passage was meant so that a father could protect a the daughter in a situation where the man was evil or unfit. There is a bond formed when a man takes a woman’s virgintiy. That bond remains no matter what vows are taken with anyone else.
Good submission
A girl had a relationship with a guy and later friended his elder brother and got married and has been bothering her. Should her marriage continue or quit.Please I need help